Tag Archives: Sisters

The Yin and Yang of Growing Up

Josi, always the neat nick, has developed sloppy habits over the past months. Her personal space is untidy. Most would see it as neat, but I have noticed a change.

She finds sharing space with her sister less than desirable. Dirty clothes, that once made it immediately into the hamper, lie in a heap. The desk and chair she had to have sit unused, piled with books, papers and other objects not put away. She does her homework in the kitchen.

At her request we put a mirror up on the inside of her closet door (now Holden wants one as well). She checks her appearance before going out of the house. That tells me a lot.

She’s growing up and as she does her interests expand—an iPod, CD’s, books, her collection of containers, scrapbooks, pictures of friends, and trophies and ribbons fill her shelves. I have given into her clutter as long as she keeps her mess to her areas of the room she shares with Aubry. The small space is hers, encroached on by her sister. She is carefully, strategically asserting new independence as she rallies for a room of her own. Space in our home does not allow for her own room yet, perhaps when Holden goes off to college.

And while this all goes on, my previously messy daughter Aubry has evolved into an extremely orderly child, folding her clothes with military preciseness. Organizing her books by subject and preference. Interesting…


Filed under International Adoption, The International Mom

Bubble Thoughts

Sometimes it takes a lot to get siblings to speak kindly to each other.

Off schedule over the holiday break and cooped up inside due to the rainy cold weather, the kids’ lack of physical activity began to show. Antagonism entered.

Around the table after a meal, another petty argument ensued between my girls. I had Josi and Aubry apologize to each other thinking that would be a step in the right direction. Before I could suggest an activity for them to do together Josi piped up, “She doesn’t mean it. The bubble over her head says something else!”

I didn’t see a bubble. My daughter had me there, “What are you talking about?”

“The bubble over her head…the talk bubble. You know, like in comics,” Josi said and drew an imaginary speech bubble in the air. She was obviously not finished venting at her sister.

I believe my eyebrows made it up to my hairline on that one. She had to be kidding. Now she could read her sister’s mind? (Aubry seemed sincere to me.)

Mark was still at the table and I looked at him. Big mistake; we lost it. Our laughter was contagious and the girls started laughing too. What Josi’s creative mind had conjured up did what I couldn’t do—stop the arguing. Off they went to play air hockey, argument forgotten.

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Filed under International Adoption, Multicultural Families, The International Mom


SeptemberOctober 2009 114Josi arrived home late last night from her exchange trip and is taking full advantage of Fall Break by sleeping in. As I write this it is after 10 a.m.

I slept in too, getting up hours after my normal time. I went in hunt for Aubry, who was not in her bed. She was behind the closed door of Greyson’s room – engrossed in her Nintendo DS.

“Good morning, sweetie. What are you doing in here?” 

“I didn’t want to wake Josi. She’s still sleeping. I was starting to cough, so I came in here,” she answered.

“Thank you for doing that, honey. You were very thoughtful. Josi is tired.”

“I’m wearing my glasses.”

“I can see that. Thank you, sweetie.”

I kissed her and closed the door behind me, proud that my daughter had shown consideration for her tired sister. She did it on her own.


Filed under International Adoption, Multicultural Families, Parenting, The International Mom