Monthly Archives: October 2010

We Are Family

Sometimes we forget that we don’t have solely biological “ties” within our family. The facts of “born into” and “adopted into” are blurred. They hold no importance, other than they are part of our family story and culture.

Sometimes we fail to see how much we do differ when with each other. We dwell deeper, seeking and recognizing the essence encased within the skin and features of the child or adult we know, love and respect. Despite our differences we are more alike than not.

We take it for granted that others outside of family and friends “see” those invisible threads and how we interconnect and transect. Typically they don’t because we are reminded of that by a look, a comment or a question. Such is the territory of transracial and multiracial families. Conspicuous families.

What adults and children question and comment on unifies us because we are forced to confront and talk over why those questions and comments arise and how we feel and address them. Being in the position of having to validate the legitimacy of our family on a regular basis provides the opportunity to claim our children and each other over and over again. Claiming says:

“You belong.”

 “You matter.”

  “I value you.”

We are family. A husband and wife, mom and dad, sons and daughters, and brothers and sisters. Created through marriage, birth and adoption. The threads of love, compassion, understanding, support, and grace weave through our souls, binding us together.


Filed under Adoptive Mom's Perspective, Claiming, Family, Multicultural Families, The International Mom