The Case for the Case

“Who’s in the case?”

The case Aubry referred to was Aunt Do’s casket, closed (thank goodness) and resting atop a whatever the piece of furniture it is that caskets rest on. The blue casket (Aunt Do’s favorite color) was decorated with a shawl of lovely fresh cut flowers and pictures of her from throughout her lifetime.

“Aunt Do is in there, Honey. Well, her body is,” I said.

“Can you open it up?”


“Can someone else get it open, Mommy? I want to see her.”

Of course Aubry wanted to see her. I did not. “No. You can’t see her. Just remember her as she was.”

“Why is she in that case?”

Aubry wasn’t about to let it go. I began to explain general burial customs and was interrupted by the start of the service. Aubry sat on my lap, pondering why a dead body goes into a case. She understood more later when the casket was lowered into the ground at the gravesite.

“Oh, the case keeps her clean, Mommy. Right?”

“Yes, honey. Something like that.”

Aubry went over to check out the new digs.  Aunt Do would have appreciated her great niece’s concerns.



Filed under Epiphiany, International Adoption, Multicultural Families, The International Mom

4 responses to “The Case for the Case

  1. Hi Judy! Thanks for linking me to a conversation you’ve posted. I love checking out new blogs (when I have the time) and our new Conversations with My Kids on Fridays is a great way to meet some new writers. How interesting that you also had recently written about death. Seeing death through the eyes of my kids has been so healing for me. Reminds me to stay present in life.

    Hope you had a great weekend and I’ll see you around!


  2. Judy, I just love the way children have such a natural way of viewing death. I’ve written about my own daughters’ reactions at funerals of loved ones. Their innocence is so refreshing, isn’t it?

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