Tag Archives: Diversity

The “Family” Project

Aubry and Greyson are often found somewhere by themselves, playing and laughing. A few days ago they were taking “family pictures” and movies of their stuffed “friends” with Aubry’s camera. The “friends,” were a collection of soft stuffed dolls, stuffed animals, Ugly Dolls, and, as my kids have labeled them, “fatsos.” Humor me…

I believe kids-play is quite revealing. In fact experts agree. Observe and you will learn how your child:

• organizes,
• thinks,
• perceives and feels about their world,
• uses words and concepts,
• relates to others—recognizing theirs and others’ feelings, and
• modulates their behavioral.

My two were shooting family pictures and movies of their stuffed families in various places throughout the house and making up stories to go along with their efforts. They shared their creative project with me, giggling and talking over one another in their excitement. The groupings were cute, however I became more fascinated as the word “adoption” became a common thread (just in case you are new to this blog, adoption is part of our family). Except for the family of Ugly dolls, the groupings differed—actually mirroring our family. The parents were often the same type of stuffed toy or of the same color or hue (like Mark and me). The babies never “matched.” The groupings were always all over one another, again similar to us. (We’re a fairly demonstrative crew.)

I asked a few questions about the stuffed families, but my kids didn’t want to talk only create and share. They were onto a new idea—dress Butch and Marley up (our boy kitties). Uh, no success there.

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Filed under Adoptive Mom's Perspective, Identity, Multicultural Families, Racial Identity, The International Mom

Judging a Book by its Cover

“That’s the White cul-de-sac,” he said, pointing left as we drove further into his middle-class neighborhood.

“What do you mean by that? What about the rest of the neighborhood?” I said.

“Only Whites live there. The rest of the neighborhood is mixed,” said Holden’s close friend, who is a Black teen.

“How do you feel about that?”

“Well, when I walk past the cu-de-sac to go play basketball they go into their houses. Every time! They’re so obvious. It’s pretty funny,” said Holden’s friend.

I didn’t find it funny. Only alarming and sad.

The boys cracked some jokes as we pulled into the driveway to drop off the friend, my happiness about spending a short time in the company of two wonderful boys had been diminished by cold hard facts.

As we left I asked Holden if he truly ever considered what his friend felt, what he lived with—the prejudice because of the color of his skin. He grew quiet and then responded that he hadn’t. Of course, Holden knew I was launching into a teachable moment. I went on to explain that his brother and sisters deal with this every day and always will. They are so young that they don’t fully understand the veiled prejudice they are experiencing, but as they grow older they will see it for what it is. People “judge a book by its cover.” 

To some extent, we are all guilty of it.

“That sucks, Mom,” he said.

I so agree with his admission. Discussions about race, racism and prejudice need to happen early and often. Take advantage of teachable moments.

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Filed under Adoptive Mom's Perspective, Advocacy, The International Mom

¡Feliz Navidad! We Wish you a Merry Christmas!

Best wishes to you and yours for a healthy and  joyous holiday season!

 

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Filed under Family Celebrations, Guatemala, Multicultural Families, The International Mom